Wednesday, October 31, 2007

October on the Microsoft Campus


After snapping these photos (egads, with my iPhone no less) during a few fall visits to Microsoft, I overheard a receptionist telling a group of shutter-happy Japanese visitors that there is no photography allowed on campus, inside or outside the buildings. I stopped. I promise.

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Tuesday, October 23, 2007

TLAs (Three Letter Acronyms) and Beyond

A new TLA often creates FUD. (Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt) Has our language become too cumbersome? Are we in such a hurry that we can’t be bothered saying so many words? “I’m sorry,” we say, “I’d love to talk to you but I am in a tremendous hurry. Perhaps I could just say the first letter of each word of every sentence?” WTF!

Every industry has its own particular acronyms. Our internet industry is one of the greatest creators of new TLAs, but we also share many traditional ones as well. I’ve included some fun examples below and I pose the question, “Do we need more acronyms or less?” WWTD? (What would Tim Burners-Lee Do?)

I decided not to list “chat speak” which is a language all its own. These abbreviations are almost emoticons describing fleeting feelings, lol. (Laugh out Loud)

PEBKAC (Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair) A subtle way technical support people describe a problem caused by a user who can’t figure out how to use a computer.

RTFM (Read The Frickin’ Manual) A response to an obvious computer question may illicit this abbreviation.

SWOT (Strengths Weaknesses Opportunities & Threats) A strategic analysis technique developed at Stanford in the 1960s as a way to compartmentalize planning.

CYA (Cover Your Ass) When creating contracts or proposals, this is a more fun way to say “assumptions” or “caveats”.

SWAG (Stuff We All Get) The free stuff given away to those in (or near) the internet industry. But, as I wrote about in SWAG Stories, this one has many definitions.

OOF (Out Of Facility) Originally used in academic settings and has now come to mean Out of the Office in the corporate world.

FUBAR (Fucked Up Beyond All Repair) Borrowed from the military, like many of our acronyms. Used to describe a project that will never get well.

SNAFU (Situation Normal, All Fucked Up) A WWII term the troops used to describe that everything is as screwed up as usual.

IP (Internet Protocol) or (Intellectual Property) I’ve been in quite a few digital studio environments where it was not always clear whether the conversation was about IP numbers for the server or ownership rights regarding a piece of content.

ASP (Active Server Pages) or (Application Service Provider) Many acronyms have multiple meanings, but this one in particular can get quite confusing. An ASP may run ASP, for example.

Even TLA has multiple meanings. It can mean Three Letter Acronym, Trial Lawyers Association, True Love Always or Top Level Architecture.

Want to explore more? Go to the Internet Acronyms Dictionary. We could go on and on… 24/7.

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Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Idioms, Credos, Sayings and Maxims: Part 1

In the digital media business, as with many industries, communication sometimes consists of trite sayings that rattle off the tongue almost absentmindedly. Many of these utterances are merely verbal filler spoken by people who are trying to fill the air with words. However, many of these mottoes and adages are actually solid truisms. I've collected some "words to live by" below. I hope you'll consider these to be helpful little aphorisms which you can use to solidify your succinct understand of the universe.

"Pay yourself first." Whether you are a business person or you're just doing your home finances, a cardinal rule is to set aside your money first. Someone is always owed something (the tax man, the landlord, the bookie). Remember to get yours before you give 'em theirs.

"Don’t throw good money after bad." If you've spent a bunch of money and the effort is failing, don't spend more money to try and fix it.

"Make more than you spend." This seems simple, but I saw quite a few dot com companies staffed by people who thought this rule was antiquated and obsolete.

"Beware the FUD." Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt are familiar bedfellows of the entrepreneur. In small quantities it is normal, but don't allow FUD to rule your world. FUD is used by your enemies (and by deceptive advertisers) to influence your thoughts and actions.

"As soon as you’ve landed the deal, shut up and leave." If you have a deal, the best thing you can do is wrap up the meeting and go away before the other party has a chance to change their mind.

"Wear a belt with your suspenders." In England they say "belt and braces" which means the same thing. If you want to make extra sure your pants don't fall down, wear a belt in case your suspenders break. This is being double-insured.

"Don’t be all mouth and no trousers." We all know people who are all talk and no action.

"Pour ‘em strong." A philosophy of some bartenders, cuz if the drinks are strong then the customers will keep coming back. Pouring a weak drink might save you money in the short term, but won't get you known as the place to be. A good deal increases sales volume. A slightly smaller profit margin may net you more income in the end.

"Don’t fall for the bait and switch." A product is advertised as an amazing deal, but in the end it turns out that the deal is altered to such an extent that the original deal is gone. A car salesman takes you for a ride in the car with all the extras and when you decide to buy it he notices a scratch on the car and switches it for another one which he says is exactly the same. When you get it home, you realize it is missing some features you had assumed were included because you saw those features during the test drive.

"Unless you are the lead dog, the view is always the same." Similar to the belief that being second is being last. The lead sled dog has the view of the world out in front, the other dogs are looking at butt.

"Don’t sell the steak, sell the sizzle." It has been said a thousand times, but it still holds true. You can't just put the product out there and expect it to move, you need to tell the world why it is amazing. As Elmer Wheeler said back in 1936, "It is the sizzle that sells the steak and not the cow, although the cow is, of course, mighty important."

"Your mileage may vary." Beware this phrase or others like it. It basically says that your experience won't compare with what has been advertised. You'll get less and you can't say nothin' cuz we warned you.

"Pony up." Simply meaning, pay what you owe.

"Eat what you kill." This is direct cause-and-effect business. Self-employed consultants understand this. Go out there and make it happen so that you can eat. If you hunt it down and kill it, then it is all yours and you deserve it.

"If a frog had wings he wouldn’t bump his ass a hoppin’." I often hear people whine and moan that if only they had some item or talent, then they would be successful. I tell them they don't have it so figure out how to succeed without it. This is similar to what a friend once told me, "Yea, and if I was an astronaut, I’d be dancin' around on the moon."

UPDATE: See the next installment Idioms, Credos, Sayings and Maxims: Part 2

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Sunday, October 14, 2007

No Schmooze, You Lose


Schmooze to Live, Live to Schmooze. Ultimately, all business is about relationships. Those who are good at making and keeping contacts are the winners in the end. Those who are creepy and dishonest can only survive for a short time before everyone stops returning their calls. The slime gets weeded out, the sincere rises to the top.

Schmooze. To Schmooze. To idly blather in pursuit of gains. Press the flesh. Grab and grin. Meet and greet. Going to the Meet Market. This is a necessary aspect of a successful life in the internet business, be you a designer or salesperson. You need to get out from behind your desk and gab with other people from your industry.

In other contexts, the term is sometimes used to describe getting out of a sticky situation, like talking your way out of a parking ticket. However, in the business world it is used to describe what has become an art and a craft. The fine art of slick networking.

For further research, don't miss Guy Kawasaki and his Theory of Schmoozing version 1.0.

Also, back in July I blogged about business networking sites, which could be considered "virtual" schmoozing. Although these sites cannot compare with real, flesh-n-blood schmoozing.

There are many events that allow digital media professionals to practice their schmoozing. Check out Meet Up, NetParty, Toastmasters, The Rotary Club and various Chamber of Commerce events in your city.

A wise friend once said to me that a main goal of any businessperson should be to create a list of 100 people who will take your call...and enjoy it. You don't want folks to sigh heavily when they hear that you are on the phone, you want them to feel relieved that you called.

Some Books you might want to check out:
Mr. Shmooze: The Art and Science of Selling Through Relationships by Richard Abraham
It's Not Your Smarts, It's Your Schmooze: How to Succeed Without Being Brilliant by Ty Freyvogel
The Art of Schmooze, Vol. 1: The Confident Schmoozer by Beth Mende Conny
How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less by Nicholas Boothman
Life's a Pitch!: From Hosting to Toasting...from News to Schmooze by Soni Dimond

Now get out there and GRAB-N-GRIN!

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Saturday, October 6, 2007

Technology, Entertainment, Design


Since 1984, the TED Conference has organized many of the worlds great thinkers, artists, scientists, architects and performers for an annual gathering. Each presenter gets only 18 minutes to give a talk. This forces them to crystallize their ideas into a direct and efficient performance.

Recently TED has embarked on an ambitious web initiative. They have digitized many of these speakers and are offering their talks free to the world via their website.

Some of my favorite talks include:

Dutch artist Theo Jansen demonstrates his amazingly lifelike kinetic sculptures, built from plastic tubes and lemonade bottles.

Planetary scientist Carolyn Porco shows breathtaking images from the Cassini voyage to Saturn.

In a friendly, high-speed presentation, Will Wright demos his newest game, Spore, which promises to dazzle users even more than his previous masterpieces.

Jonathan Harris wants to make sense of the infinite world on the Web -- so he builds dazzling graphic interfaces that help us visualize the data floating around out there.

After sweetly confessing that he never meant to be a performance artist, Golan Levin explains that his art is all about the quest to find a personal way to use a computer.

Bill Stone, the maverick cave explorer who invented robots and dive equipment that have allowed him to plumb Earth's deepest abysses, explains his efforts to build a robot to explore Jupiter's moon Europa.

Kevin Kelly uses evolutionary theory to discuss the purpose and value of technology.

Also, don't miss The Future We Will Create: Inside the World of TED, a documentary about the conference, available from Netflix thru their "Watch Instantly" online streaming video service.

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